Andrew Archibald

The Count of Toir Tuirc.


Count Andrew Archibald the First (born Andrew Ivan Brian Steven Vincent Shane Marcus Richard Rosemont Pine Muir Archibald until his mother persuaded his father to shorten the name to just “Andrew”) is a half-Elf with pale skin, black hair with a bluish tint, striking grey eyes, and a slender body that has never seen a day’s worth of work in its lifetime. His closet is the biggest room in his sprawling manor. His favorite colors are ultramarine, lavender, and dandelion. He hates all shades of red, brown, and pink. Andrew also has an unnaturally strong hatred for the colors of beige and grey. The only wine he drinks is champagne, as regular wine appears too red for his liking. Many view Count Archibald as a brilliant lunatic who can effectively keep his region running well despite his eccentricities and extreme vanity. His attitudes are such that even Emperor Carolus tries to sit as far away as possible from Archibald when the two are ever in the same room.


Early Life

Andrew Archibald is the son of the late Horatio Gerald Patrick Louis Anthony William David Dave Timothy Scott Wilhelm Archibald the Fifth (whom in life preferred to be known as “Tim”) and one of Tim’s four Elven mistresses. It is said that during his mother’s pregnancy, she was given ground up unicorn horn, dragon blood, fried aboleth, and salads made with the leaves of treants. Whether or not this contributed to Andrew’s ostensible insanity is unknown, as the Archibald House is known for having loony patriarchs and matriarchs. Regardless, he often accompanied his father to dealings with other members of the nobility. At the age of twenty-three, he took his father’s place as Count of Toir Tuirc when Tim died at the age of sixty-seven.

Count of Toir Tuirc

Andrew inherited Seilam Manor, a massive property that had been in his family since the early days of Iuris. He married Baroness Rhia Anselmo (one of his cousins) not long after. In addition, he decided to outdo his father and amassed a harem of thirty-three women (two Dwarves, a Gnome, six Elves, seven Humans, a Dragonborn, three Halflings, two Tieflings, four half-Elves, two half-Orcs, two water Genasi, a fire Genasi, a wind Genasi, and an earth Genasi) and two men (a half-Elf and Tiefling), compared to the twenty-seven women his father had at his peak. Although it became very clear to noble and commoner alike that Andrew might have claimed the title of “Most Insane Mortal to Walk the Face of the Empire” by the age of twenty-five, Andrew showed a great deal of skill and intelligence when overseeing the Toir Tuirc region. He managed to lower taxes but increase revenue by hiring bandits to kill monsters in the wilderness. This not only reduced crime thanks to the bandits’ inevitable deaths when Andrew asked of them to fight a young red dragon (which almost always turned out to be an adult), but it allowed for more farmland since the wilderness areas that were cleared became safe. Andrew also increased mining production for gemstones, often buying sapphires, topazes, and amethysts himself with his personal funds. Arts also became more popular under Andrew, particularly paintings of the ocean painted with vibrant blues, shades of purple, and glowing yellow suns. There is in fact a room in Seilam Manor dedicated to nothing but paintings of the ocean. A staff of fifteen maids, eight butlers, one hundred and twenty guards, two spies, and an assassin is on hand at all times in Seilam Manor.


  • The idea for Andrew’s character came from a conglomerate of real and fictional European nobles and rulers. Real influences include the Roman Emperors Nero and Caligula, and the the French King Louis XIV. Fictional nobles include Rosewaal from Re:Zero and the version of Count Saint-Germain from Drifters.
  • The gimmick of Andrew’s many names comes from Metallica bassist Robert Trujillo. Robert’s full name is Roberto Agustín Miguel Santiago Samuel Trujillo Veracruz.
  • The name of his manor, Seilam, is Welsh for “madhouse”.

Andrew Archibald

Rat Catchers Freelance Inc. Rattlehead Rattlehead